The New Year’s resolutions – it’s not the how, it’s the why

It is that part of the year again when we want to put our past year behind and start fresh. With a lot of enthusiasm, energy and high hopes.
We know we were a bit lazy last year, but this year it will be a totally different story! We promise!

So we bring our dusty gym accessories from the closet, buy some new weights or gym membership and we know that this time we will rule the world. Just in case, because we know ourselves, we print or buy a large calendar, so it will be easier for us to follow the days we will exercise (most definitely every day, but you never know if something important interrupts us and we miss a day, or – god forbid – two).

Source: Wikimedia

But as time passes, maybe in the middle of January if we are weak, or maybe in the middle of February or March, we realize that our equipment is getting more and more dusty in a corner somewhere. Oh, ok.. Then let’s wait for the New Year again. Next year, oh yes, next year I will be disciplined and I will do it for the whole year for sure!

What happened?

The motivation lasted only a few days or a few weeks. Then we managed to find some really powerful excuses that postponed our exercise for a day, two days, three, a week, a month.

Why did we lose the motivation?

We said on New Year’s Eve: “This year I will stay fit and I will exercise every day.”

The first mistake was that we just told ourselves what we would like and how will we do it. Motivation gets its energy from WHY, not from HOW. But even if we did say why, it is possible that the why was this: “.. because I want to be in shape” or “.. because this will be good for my future me”.

This why is a surface why. After this why we should ask ourselves: “Why do I want to be in shape?” or “Why will it be good for my future me?”

The deeper we go, the better can we understand what are the links between different parts of our lives and how they are connected. It is not just the exercise that is important for getting in shape. What about food, cigarettes, stress, time, friends, illnesses…?

If we want to get in shape, we need to watch what we consume and what not to consume, how we live our lives, who we are with (if everybody around us is lazy, that is not much of a motivation for us, is it?), if we have digestion or other health concerns/problems (if every calorie sticks on us, it is unfortunately much more difficult to get and stay in shape), etc.

At the end after many whys, we find out that the problem is much deeper and that certain goals can be achieved only if we change our lifestyle and how we think.

If you would be sincerely happy with yourself, you wouldn’t have New Year’s resolutions, because you would already do what you like to get to where you would like to be.

So, are you willing to change your lifestyle to get what you want, or are you going to refine what you want and then change?